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Keano

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I got this one via mail, rather funny. But it’s not x-rated!! so dahanetoon aab nayofte!!lol :D ;)

 

 

Subject: MARRIAGE, LOVE AND SEX

 

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men & women differ

so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars

thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and

women with their heart.

 

I have never figured out why the sexual desire gene gets thrown

into a state of turmoil, when it hears the words "I do."

 

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my wife and I were getting into bed. Well,

the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't

feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

 

I said "WHAT????!!! What was that?!" So she says the words that

every husband on the planet dreads to hear..."You're just not in

touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy

your physical needs as a man."

 

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me

for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing

that nothing was going to happen that night I went to sleep.

 

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time

with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a

big, big unnamed dept. store. I walked around with her while she

tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't

decide which one to take so I told her we'll just buy them all. She

wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get

a pair for each outfit. We went on to the jewellery dept. where she

picked out a pair of diamond earrings.

 

Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was

one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing

me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even

know how to play tennis.

 

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the

excitement.

 

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this

is all dear, let's go to the cashier".

 

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I

don't feel like it."

 

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a

baffled WHAT???!!!"

 

I then said, "Really honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for

awhile.. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man

enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

 

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me I

added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the

things I buy you?"

 

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.

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Guest King is ecstatic :))

loooooooooool, so funny, yet so true! ;)

Most women are materialistic! B) (Careful! I never generalized it!)

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Guest missloofa

women are the core of all evil...and yes I can generalize because It's true...

yet you men can't live without us...

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loooooooooooooooooooooooooool pourya, that was mad. lovvvvveeeeed it. ill make sure my man doesnt read that. :lol:

that was so funny.

 

 

and missloofa, totally agree, women are evil.

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I wanna try the jackhammer position.

What does that include exactly? It sounds kind've grotty. :ph34r:

It's already described somewhere in the thread; by the way, are you in England???

I'm asking since this is the first time I've seen the word "grotty".

I am NOT from England, though I have nothing against them. No, I am from Australia and proud of it. :D

Oh BTW I only read some of the first page and decided that I wanted to find out what the "jackhammer" thing was. :blink: I'll read the rest of this topic more carefully.

Not that I'm going to use it because it sounds like it belongs on a porn site. :blink:

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And they're all females!!!!

 

YOOOOOHOOOOOOOO!

The more female the better!!!!!!!

 

YOOOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO!

 

More mamas, more mamas!

I want 100 Aussie mamaaaaaaaaaaaaaasssssssssSSSSsssssSSSSsSsSsSsSsS! :rolleyes:B)

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I like to be nasty when I do it with you (Referring only to girls) but not always! only from time to time. I like to talk dirty to you (Only girls) but not always, only from time to time. I want you to do everything for me (Only girls) but not always, only from time to time! I want you to make me feel like I am in full control (Mostly in bed) and this one all the time!

 

 

 

 

 

Cuz I am the King! ;)

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I think dodo is a dokhtare pashmaaloooooo! :lol:

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One of my fetishes is "Dokhtarhaaye pashmaaloo" :lol:

Just kidding!

 

But seriously, I have a feeling that you need lots of waxing! :lol:

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By the way dodo jaan!

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vali seriously. khodet va oonaye ke ham date meekony. kheily kheily kheily bishtar az man lazem daran. :)

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Oh, I see!

 

Do you think guys should spank girls while .... from behind?

 

I mean if you're girl, would you like your partner do that to your butt?

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Oh, I see!

 

Do you think guys should spank girls while .... from behind?

 

I mean if you're girl, would you like your partner do that to your butt?

youve had plenty of sexual expriances why dont you ask them girls. :)

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Khenge!

That's why there's such thing as referendums, so ppl's votes count in!!!

Otherwise they would only have a handful of ppl's votes and base it on upon everybody elses' view!

Why do you always like to dodge questions, in a kind of deftly manners? :huh:

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Why do you always like to dodge questions, in a kind of deftly manners? :huh:

coz im dodo ;) :lol:

 

 

and that is why we have freedom of speach. To say any thing we want :)

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Oh, I see!

 

Do you think guys should spank girls while .... from behind?

 

I mean if you're girl, would you like your partner do that to your butt?

My girl loved it :lol:

 

Oh, I miss her :(

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